Today I took a walk to the Farmers Market at Third and Fairfax to buy dog food from Huntington Meats, when my iPhone was stolen. There are a lot of good reasons to shop at independently owned stores, but the fact that you can count on the nice guys who work there when you're in a total panic over a small, stolen, six hundred dollar device, is one not to be overlooked. I'd left the butcher a few minutes before, phone in hand, and walked a few hundred steps to the nut store to buy some salty toasted mixed nuts since I am still not eating sugar, and when I noticed the nuts where in my hand and my iPhone wasn't, I ran back to the butcher (had I left it there?), then back to the nut place (had she seen a phone?), and then back to the butcher—this time not to look for my phone, but just plain desperate for help. Jim the Butcher entrusted one of his younger employees (i.e. knows how to use an iPhone) to use his "find my iPhone" app to find my iPhone. The guy's name was Charlie, and, to make a ...

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I've never been much of a beverage person. I haven't drunk Gatorade since I was a 12 year-old girl with wiry, braided red pigtails. I have never drunk a Coca-Cola in my life (a fact that Southerners find fascinating-to-impossible). And I don't go in for iced tea or Arnold Palmers. When I'm thirsty, I drink water. Plain and simple. No ice, no fruit, no flavoring (please). But then, like love, when I least expected it, this coconut water came into my life. Taste Nirvana. (Sorry about the name. #notmyfault.)   I picked it out of a crowded refrigerated case one hot day last summer in New York City because I liked the tall glass bottle that it came in. It's the only coconut water I've tried that tastes like the actual water of a coconut and not watered down dirty water. I've since moved over to cans, which look reassuringly like tennis ball cans. Today, at a rate of consumption between one and three cans per day, it's fair to say I'm addicted, but worse things could happen. People say coco ...

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Having been sugar-free for 10 days now, I consider myself somewhat of an expert. At the very least I am an expert at getting through the first 10 days. So for that, here are 10 things I've learned about the first 10 days. 1. Don't quit eating sugar without pain reliever in the house. The pain in your brain will be too great to leave the house for pain reliever. 2. Your mind will tell you all kinds of crazy things including: Why are you such an extremist control freak? Sugar is a part of life!  It's Friday for God's sake and I don't care if you don't believe in God. What's a little agave gonna hurt anyone... Live a little! 3. A few dietary notes: Mayonnaise (that's Best Foods, or Hellman's, whose key ingredient is corn syrup) will beckon. A chinese chicken salad is just lettuce's way of enabling you. Cashews are fattening. This may sound like a non-sequiter until you try giving up sugar. Something crunchy is the next best thing to something sweet. Pass the cheese puffs 4. Frien ...

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I recently decided to quit eating sugar. That's as much thought as I put into the decision. I didn't give an end date or a goal or parameters or even a "definition of sugar." But I did regularly post daily How Shitty I Feel updates on Facebook and my Facebook friends, being the sort of clever people that they are, wanted me to be more specific. They asked me what was my plan. (I didn't have a plan.) They asked me, "What's the point?" "When does it end?" And "Why are you doing this again?" So here, below, are my answers to those questions. Let's start with... One. WHY: I gave up sugar for an as yet undefined period of time: I don't know. I only know that I somehow slid down the slippery slope from, "I'm at a nice dinner and the chef sent out this dessert so let me have a bite," to, "What's the difference between an oatmeal cookie for breakfast and oatmeal?" Even in my sugar-induced stupor and with an addict's skill at rationalizing, I knew something wasn't right. I heard that sugar ...

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